09 March, 2023

Adventure Everyday

Adventure means driving on Indian roads. End of story!

 

But if you MUST know more, read on.

 

A significant percentage of the population has been found resistant to change. They still follow the old traffic rules (red means STOP; yellow means LOOK; green means GO). It looks like they missed reading about these new rules:


1. RedThis no longer means you HAVE TO stop. No! Red means you can now cross the road... but a little carefully. Because people who still follow the old system might be moving on their 'green.' I know it's not your fault, but hey, let's be respectful to them. 

 

Another thing - if you are moving on red and someone stares at you aggressively, you now have all the right in the world to stare back like it's their fault. Top it up with random hand gestures that indicate, 'hey, what's wrong with you...?'



2. Yellow (Amber/Orange): Ah! This used to mean that it would turn red, and people must prepare to stop. I can't believe we spent ages thinking that way.

 

Not anymore. Thankfully.

 

This yellow light is a test of the acceleration of your vehicle. According to the latest rules, yellow means increasing your vehicle's speed to cross quickly. Come what may, you don't have to fall into the category of 'foolish people' who end up halting in the front row. 



3. Green: It used to mean 'go freely.' Jeez! Seriously?

 

The green now means that you must look in all directions and protect yourself from people who are rightfully moving on their 'red.' Green is the most dangerous signal to move.

 

Be very, very careful when it's green.







4. No Lights Working: A fantastic new addition! It means it is a free-for-all. Survival of the fittest! Everybody from every direction is free to cross. It's a winner-takes-all situation.

 

This particular arrangement of lights (rather the lack of it) often leads to traffic jams. This means that you must know how to safeguard your interest, and it doesn't matter if you end up leaving the entire generation behind in a 'traffic jam' because of your actions. Do not show sensitivity to others.









5. All Lights On At the Same Time:
 This is one of the most confusing situations. We have yet to figure out what to do with this situation. For now, we can only recommend taking a u-turn and going back home. Or do you have a better idea?

 




Well, that was it. With the new traffic rules, life on Indian roads has become much more exciting and adventurous. We don't have to wait for weekends to catch up with some action. We move about in action!

 

There is one exception to the rules. You can do whatever you want... as long as you are muscular... or have solid contacts. 

 

Just say this, "Tu jaanta nahi hai mera..."


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